2nd edit- feedback

After I sent my editing 1st draft, I emailed it to my teacher and she kindly showed this to a friend of hers who is a professional cameraman. He said the shots were lovely however, he did still not quite recognise the film was a thriller and that the digging looked like someone was gardening in their back garden. He suggested that I got some clothes, covered them in blood and threw them in the hole. I took inspiration from his suggestion and took a hoodie, put in it a plastic bag and then buried it.
My teacher then noticed that there was no diegetic sound and that it would be more effective if there was. I had forgotten about this and glad someone had brought it up. I decided to include the sound of a shovel scraping along the ground and voice overs where I thought them appropriate. She also noticed that the painting action did not look realistic as it was a splattered painting and my actress was stroking the painting with a brush. I refilled the action of painting quickly and replaced all the visible shots.

Second Edit Movie Introduction

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jhxvucGp8qY

Part 1 of exam

The first shot we see is a bird eye view of the two main characters. This is an example of verisimilitude. It then leads into cross-cutting of the same two characters, one watching the other sleep, combined a pan around the same characters face while he keeps his eyeliner off shot to the other character gives the audience the impression that character staring (David) is menacing, determined and plotting while across from him the character still sleeping (Ben) is vulnerable, innocent and weak. There is a voice over talking of how one of the character's plans to kill his brother: we can assume this is the menacing character David.

There is an example of old-fashion CGI which symbolised the story of evolution as the voice over compared modern, average man to his 'potato with eye tentacles' brother, saying his brother is a step back in evolution. The next shot is of his brother eating in an animalistic way. We know David is disgusted by this as in the next shot, we see an close up of his face.

There a many interesting point of view shots. During an elipsis,  David is in a tree, he watches his brother who is below, looking up at him. This shows that Ben is inferior to David (whiz helped move the story over time periods effectively) . Also, when David is looking out on his brother from a window he is holding a toy gun,  the voice over talks about how he is going to kill him 'smartly' as the frame is then edited to look like the viewer on a rifle, focussing the audiences view to the 'target'.

There is a sound bridge of a radio which cuts across the establishing shot of a block of flats to the kitchen table where there is an example of shot-reverse-shot of the speakers during a conversation. When the authoritative figure of both the characters, their dad, is speaking, shots are longer compared to others and the frame is shot from slightly below him to show superiority.

The opening credits are subtle and only start to appear at 2:27 which is quite late into the film. the director may have wanted to delay them to introduce the characters and the story effectively without any distractions for the audience.

Whilst in a classroom scene, we are shown Davids point of view on what he is doodling on a desk. His teacher's voice is muffled until we hear her call him name. The banter between the students and the teacher show normal life which contrast drastically with David's life with Ben having to always he with him.

The bus journey Ben takes is a mixture of shot and long shots., contrasting with each other giving the impression of dizziness. There is a soft focus on everyone else other than Ben showing his confusion. The piano music is slow and weak with no beat, drastically contrasting with the music which is played throughout the clip which is up-beat.